Gilmo Got a Job

As of yesterday I have been offered a junior systems engineering position with Lockheed Martin’s Rotary Mission Systems Division.

Ho’ boy does that feel good. Finally I know what I’m going to be doing next year! Granted I still have to figure out where I’m going to live and how I’m going to get around, but one way or another I know I’m not going to be depressed basement dweller! I’m gonna be makin’ stacks, and engineering mission systems! Or am I?

Right so, let’s mash B on all the celebration and get real for a bit. Yes, I am excited about the offer, and yes it’s real freaking nice for someone to essentially affirm your self-worth, but I have some reservations. It’s a very nice offer, with one major complication: I have a week to decide.

Uuuuuuuuuuuuugh
Uuuuuuuuuuuuugh

My instincts tell me I should wait until I get answers from all of my applications then make a choice among them, but I can’t do that if I only have a week. I may not end up hearing from some of my other applications until December. And so now were back in the exact same quandary from last semester.

giphy-2

Last semester I applied to internships. Pretty early on I got an offer, but it was so early that the same thing happened. I was forced between choosing the guaranteed option or waiting to maybe getting to do something that was higher on my list. Last semester I chose the latter, I turned down the offer and guess what happened….nothing. And then I spent the next three months moping around Vermont.

That being said, it was a very pleasant moping.
That being said, it was a very pleasant moping.

So here we are again. In the exact….same….thing….

Sure, people like Star Trek right?
Sure, people like Star Trek right?

But of course it gets continually more complicated. Earlier this week I also got invited to another college hiring event. From what I can tell it’s exactly the same thing as the event I went to when I got this offer. The impression that I got from going to the last event was that it was less about seeing if you were a good candidate, and more about convincing you to work there. So that says to me I’ll probably end up getting an offer from there as well, and that one is a space flight operations job which sounds bad fucking ass!

SPAAAAAACE
SPAAAAAACE

And here’s where we go down a never ending spiral of self-doubt. My instincts tell me to turn down this offer and wait for another better one, but I’m basing that off of  a bunch of assumptions, and what if all of my assumptions are wrong and I’m just being an arrogant prick for thinking that I’m a shoe-in for those other positions? Plus, the last time I waited I ended up with nothing. Can you tell I’m not a betting man?
It’s times like this that I’m forced to ask WWKRD? What would Kenny Rogers do?

UUUUUUUUUUUGH! And now I also feel like a prick for complaining about this shit. It wasn’t long ago I was sitting at my desk stress eating over the fact that I didn’t know what I was going to do with my life and how I was going to be poor a living in my parents’ basement and people from high school were going to make fun of me and I was going to be horribly depressed. I know because that was yesterday. And I know how fucking much it bugged me when people would talk about all these great jobs they were getting. “OMG I HAVE SO MANY OFFERS FROM BOEING I DON’T KNOW WHICH ONE TO TAKE LMAO!” “YEAH I’LL DO THAT PART OF THE GROUP PROJECT, IT’LL REALLY HELP ME FOR MY BOEING JOB WHICH I HAVE AND YOU DON’T BECAUSE YOUR A WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT! TEEHEE!” Fuck…You. God damn, I hate being that person, and yet here I am. Bitching about having TOO MANY options. You see how this is a lose-lose for me yes? Great now I’m begging you to feel bad for me. GAH! Everything I do makes me feel bad. Hey who wants some dank memes?

Deary me, how zany
Deary me, how zany

Whew, ok. I think that dank meme has sufficiently centered me, let us continue. I think the important thing to remember is that whatever job I chose is not, or I should say, probably won’t be the rest of my life. It’s easy to forget that this shit isn’t permanent. I can always leave, I can always move around. Hell I could probably transfer the day after I get there if I really wanted. I think the important thing is to find something I can be satisfied doing for, at the very least, the time being. Something that will facilitate the other things I enjoy (like $2000 gaming computers) and something that can help me get to where I ultimately want to go. So am I going to take the job? I’ll let you know in a week.

TIL Giraffes can't wink...
TIL Giraffes can’t wink…

 

 

 

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