Fame Adjacent

Well it happened. A member of my High School class went on and reached fame status…and it wasn’t me. yes it would seem Kirsten Anderson of dramatic fame went on and landed herself a starring role in the traveling Broadway hit The Sound of Music.

God Damnit Kerstin
God Damnit Kerstin

I’ve always spoken very highly of my High School class (see what I did there). To this day I still believe it was one of the finest collection of intelligent individuals I’ve met to date.

With some notable exceptions
With some notable exceptions

Perhaps I’m looking back on my High School class through nostalgia-colored glasses, but the fact remains, I fully expect most of us will go on to do amazing things. But I was really hoping to be the first one.

I really wanted to drop the mic
I really wanted to drop the mic

Granted she’s only reached Tier 3 fame, so there’s plenty of room to make up, but still!I put out this lovely blog, I make short films, I played a tree one time in The Wizard of Oz (which she was in by the way),you’d think I’d at leas be Tier 2 by now, but no! I’m barely even Tier 1.

Suck my Colored Pencil
Colored Pencil: for when you want to work really hard on a joke that isn’t that funny.

Now I don’t want to disparage what Kerstin has done. She’s a marvelous human being and fantastic performer (Everyone go see The Sound of Music), but come on, I got retweeted by the Startalk Radio tumblr page one time! Again, I’m super happy for Kerstin. Nothing is better than seeing someone fulfilling their passion. That’s great. I’m just wondering how she got so famous, when I am at least 80% less famous than I should be right now.

Solitude really was not the blockbuster I had thought it to be
Solitude really was not the blockbuster I thought would be

If I can’t be famous, at least I get all the perks of being fame-adjacent. When she’s eventually this world-renown actor I’ll be able to tell all my friends about how I used to be buddies with Kerstin Anderson (because ooooof course she’s going to be a world-renown actor). Which is cool I guess. Plus if I really wanted to get some tickets to see a show I suppose it might come in handy. I don’t know, it just isn’t the same.

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO TALENTED
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO TALENTED

I had it all planned out too. I was going to get a job at NASA, work my way up the ranks, all the while creating a dope-ass science youtube-show. Then I was going to become best friends with Bill Nye and Neil Degrasse Tyson. Then once I had firmly rooted myself as the king of nerdom I was going to become an astronaut and become the first man on Mars. Then I was going to get left behind on Mars and become Matt Damon. BUT NOW THAT’S ALL RUINED, thanks a lot Kerstin!

I was really looking forward to being BFFs with Ben Affleck too
I was really looking forward to being BFFs with Ben Affleck too

Now whatever I do people back home are going to be like, “oh wow that’s real impressive, but did you hear Kerstin Anderson won a bunch of Tony’s! Like aaalll the Tony’s!” Arrrgh. Why couldn’t she have waited like 5-10 years until I was at least besties with Bill Nye. Now I will forever be compared to Kerstin. Again, I want to stress, I’m am extraordinarily excited for Kerstin, she is extremely deserving, the whole thing is wonderful, but I wanted to be the talk of the town, and now she is instead. hmpf. Ok, fine, you want me to admit it? I’m jelly. I’m one big fat jelly belly.

Just you wait
Just you wait

 

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