Valentime’s Day

Valentine’s Day is tomorrow, and I have been trying (and failing) to write something fun and witty for the past like 5 hours. Well I give up. I don’t know what to say on the matter.  So here’s all the random crap I thought up while trying to write about Valentine’s Day.

  •  It’s almost Valentine’s Day so get ready to bust out the chocolate, put on your favorite Boyz II Men CD, and snuggle up with your significant other. Or conversely if you happen to find yourself alone, bust out the chocolate, put on your favorite Boyz II Men CD, and jealously read through your friends’ Facebook profiles until you eventually cry yourself to sleep.
“This is why no one likes you Sharon”
  • It’s funny, I find that single people have a stronger reaction to Valentine’s Day then people who have social lives. The people I know who are actually in relationships seem to be pretty meh about the whole affair, while it’s the lonely people who are constantly bitching about Valentine’s Day. And I get it, no one likes being constantly reminded of their failure to find a suitable mate, but come one just get over it.
We all know Kirsten Dunst did
  • The worst part of Valentine’s Day is running into those couples who are like way too into each other. The ones who seem to enjoy beating you over the head with their mutual attraction.
  • Thank god I’m not in high school anymore. In high school there was so much pressure to find a girlfriend and do this and that and who are you going to ask to prom, and everybody else is making out and I have to eat my lunch all alone in the corner. Ok, I may have embellished that last bit, but you get the point, it’s embarrassing being the only one who’s not eating their lunch off of somebody else’s face. Dammit I did it again.
“Why is internet blogging so hard?!”
  • The nice thing about Georgia Tech is there’s not really anyone slapping you in the face with the usual Valentine’s Day hohocus. Being surrounded by people who are even nerdier and more socially awkward then you is a real confidence booster. It’s like our school motto always says: “Georgia Tech- Forever Alone”.
It's not like there's any sex to be had anyways
It’s not like there’s any sex to be had anyways
  • The best time for Valentine’s Day has to be Elementary School. Back then you didn’t have to ask anyone out, you didn’t have to try to impress anyone, and at the end you got candy. No disappoint, no soul-crushing loneliness, just me and a bag full of chocolate.
“Yeah, Valentine’s Day, whatever, do you have anymore chocolate?”
  • You’re probably wondering what I will be doing for Valentine’s Day. Uh, not much. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m single so… yeah. I probably will use the holiday as an excuse to eat my 72 oz bag of chocolate chips though (or at least what’s left of it) and listen to a bunch of Huey Lewis and the News.
Imagine this same picture, but with like half of the it missing.

Yup, that’s all I got. If you were expecting some grand soliloquy on the nature of love, sorry maybe next year, and also really? When did you get the impression that I was a master of poetry. I mean I’ve written my fair share of love no- I’m going to stop talking now. Have a fun and festive Valentine’s Day or Singles’ Awareness Day, or whatever you want to call it.