On Flying

I don’t care how cliche it sounds, I hate flying, and that’s coming from an aerospace major. I feel I should elaborate. The act of flying itself, putting aside the obnoxious travelers and disgruntled TSA agents, is quite beautiful (but you expect as much coming from an aerospace major). Soaring above the clouds, the entire world at your finger tips, defying nature, you know all that garbage. There is no greater defiance to the lord above than taking a dump at 30,000 feet. Flying is just plain fun as dicks. It is commercial flying that I hate. To illustrate my point here is one Hannibal Buress.

And that’s just the airport. You don’t need me to tell you that airports, just ask the TSA agent with his hand up your butt. If the DMV is hell on earth then airports are purgatory, not really painful, just really uncomfortable. It’s not just the airlines either, although I do have a beef with US Airways for delaying my flight 3 hours only to then cancel it. I don’t know what it is about running an airline, but apparently it requires a complete lack of competence. You’d think with all the data and logistics crap that those airlines are always bragging abo- But I’m getting off track. Airlines suck, we get that, that’s not what I’m here to talk about.

When you get right down to it commercial flying is just boring. It’s all about cargo. You have this much space, you need to move this much cargo and you have this much crap to do it, ugh, shoot me now. And I’m not just talking about FedEx either. Debate the values and intricacies of human life all you want, when it comes to designing a 747 all you are is cargo, just a big flesh sack filled with mostly water. In fact that’s how they test new planes, they just fill the seats with barrels of water. It’s not even cool cargo either, I’d take a Mars rover over 80 disgruntled dumbasses any day.

At least the Mars rover has a sense of humor
At least the Mars rover has a sense of humor

Everything in commercial flying is so derivative. Despite only being around for the past 100 years, every aspect of modern aviation has been so thoroughly inspected and dissected that not a single speck of interest or innovation remains (except maybe in the application). That’s why every plane at the airport looks the same. Because that’s just the design that works the best. The only real difference between any two planes is who’s name they print on those “safety information” cards.

Well then why am I an aerospace major (a fact I so adamantly publicize)? Because how cool is space? Because how badass are F-35 VTOL fighters? Because how much money can you make selling drones? The answer to all of these questions is a lot. Like I said, flying itself is awesome. I love all the potential in space, and defense and UAVs (that’s the pretty name for drones in case you didn’t know). Commercial flying just has nothing left to offer, the well has been sucked dry. Who knows, maybe someday someone will find some answer that revolutionizes commercial aviation, but I’m fine with not being that guy. In the meantime I’ll be in space ordering aerially dispensed Mexican food.

Head to the second star on the right and straight on 'till morning
Head to the second star on the right and straight on ’till morning

 

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One thought on “On Flying

  1. So jealous of you being in Aerospace Engineering, i’m in Aeronautical Engineering and gravity is a bitch!

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