It’s friday so you know what that means! No, I’m not talking about the weekend, it’s time for another installment of everyone’s favorite episodic internet series: Adventures in Clarksville!
Jason and Karen slowly snuck up the grand marble staircase to the second floor. They walk as lightly as they could for every step seemed to echo throughout the enormous and largely empty house. “Let’s go this way!” said Karen as they scurried down the hallway to the left. They had hardly gone three feet when the came face to face with a humongous wooden door. “Oh this has got to be Carly’s parents’ room!” said Jason. “Well then let’s go!” exclaimed Karen, pushing the heavy doors aside. The room was large an well lit, banks of windows lined the two outward facing walls, each window laced with pristine white drapes. The bed was giant, and covered in enough pillows to fill a swimming pool. Everything in the room was arranged with unnerving precision. It was as if no one had touched the room in centuries, all the furniture seemed suspended in time. Karen immediately ran and jumped on the bed. When she landed then entire mattress began to jiggle wildly. “Oh my god! It’s a water bed!” said Karen half shouting, half whispering, “Com’on get on here!” Backing up to get a proper start, Jason ran and then jumped with all his might, shaking the entire bed as he landed. The two laid there trying to suppress their laughter so as to not make too much noise. “Well at least we know Carly’s parents have good taste,” joked Karen. “Haha, maybe if it were the sixties!” said Jason.
Eyeing the door across from the bed Jason got up and said, “Hm, maybe this is where they keep all the Aztec gold.” As he through the door open the two of them stood there motionless, their mouths agape with amazement. “This has got to be the biggest closet I have ever seen!” said Karen in utter disbelief. Before them was a large walk-in closet, each wall lined with fancier and fancier clothes. On the right was a collection of the finest suits and dress shirts, while the left was lined with beautiful dresses and a wild assortment of women’s shoes. With out skipping a beat the pair dove into the closet and began going through the clothes, mocking every sparkly dress and ridiculous hat they laid their eyes on. While they were laughing about, and generally having a good time, a noise suddenly came from the hallway. “Someone’s coming!” whispered Jason. “Under the bed!” urgently replied Karen.
Meanwhile Carly, Adam, and Tommy were touring the rest of the house. “And this is the dining hall!” said Carly, “Well that’s about it, hey where’d Jason and Karen go?” “I think they went to meet us outside,” said Tommy, who didn’t really know, but didn’t really feel like finding out the real answer. “Oh, well I’m gonna go grab my bike. Adam can you come help me, it’s up really high and I can barely reach it,” said Carly. “Sure,” said Adam, and the two ran off to fetch the bycicle which was oh so hard reach. Feeling left out Tommy said, “Yeah, so…I guess I’ll just…meet you guys…over…there?” After a few minutes of waiting Tommy got bored so he did what any reasonable person would do, and decided to explore. “Hey, she forgot to show us upstairs!” Tommy said to himself. Returning to the great marble staircase in the entryway, he voyaged the uncharted territory also known as the second floor (not knowing that Jason and Karen were already up there). As he reached the upper landing he heard odd sounds coming from the hallway to the left. “Sounds like someone’s having a good time!” said Tommy to himself, “I’m definitely not going that way, who’s doing what over there, but I don’t want to find out.” So he ventured to the right. He opened the first door. The first thing he noticed was the pink. It was everywhere, all over the walls, all over the furniture, it was even all over the door nobs were pink. “Well this is definitely Carly’s room, “said Tommy closing the door. Venturing further he turned around the corner and came to another door. As he opened it he was transported to a magical land. All his cares seemed to melt away, and he was left with nothing but pure joy.
What Tommy found was Carly’s brother, Brian’s room. Seemingly every inch of wall space was devoted to displaying his incredible LEGO® collection. He had medieval LEGOs, he had Ninja LEGOs, he had Bionicles, he had Indiana Jones LEGOs, and most importantly, he had every single Star Wars LEGO set ever created. It was a child’s fantasy land, and it took two, maybe three seconds for Tommy to start playing with them like there was no tomorrow. He was waging battles, he had the Bionicles join the ninjas and the Galactic Empire to fight the Rebels with the help of Indiana Jones and the Knights of Camelot. Catapults launched huge rocks that smashed imperial fighters mid-flight. The dastardly Bionicles swarmed and surrounded Rebels, and if it were not for Indiana Jones quick thinking they would have surely parishes. The Jedi fought agains wave upon wave of evil stormtroopers, and Luke Skywalker lost an arm. Tommy was having the time of his life enacting this great battle, before long the floor was covered in the shattered remnants of the battle the epic battle. Reality hit him like a ton of bricks. He had been up there for half an hour, his friends were probably looking for him, they would be suspicious, and he had totally destroyed this kid’s room. So Tommy sprinted out the room and back downstairs.
Tune in next week to catch the epic conclusion of this installment of: Adventures in Clarksville!